Happy belated Father's Day to all my dads. As we celebrated my husband and the grandfather's yesterday, I sat on this phrase I came across in a card - "Each Family Member is Here for a Special Purpose."
Many times this purpose may not be obvious to us when we're in the midst of tension and frustration and our children don't conform to our expectations of them. One of the hardest things to do as a parent is to let go of those expectations because in many ways it's all we know since it's how we've been groomed to parent by our own parents. Think about it, even now as adults, how often are we carrying around the lingering effects of NOT meeting our parents expectations - fulfilling their perceived purpose of us? In what ways do we still carry the "I'm not enough ______" syndrome?
In Spanish the expression "La Sobremesa" is theperiod right after a meal when family and friends spend time sharing conversations or anecdotes. Often times folks can spend an easy hour or more talking, laughing and telling stories before someone starts to leave.
This Latin tradition is one I've upheld in my family and it's something I've been thinking quite a bit about over the past 2 weeks. Just the other day my uncle shared with us an audio recording of my grandfather in the garden of his home recalling the oral history of my paternal ancestors and how they came to settle in a small Spanish town. As I sat at the breakfast table playing the recording for my husband and children, all I could do was smile in gratitude. That afternoon left me thinking ....
Happy Mother's Day!!
May today be a day where you feel loved, appreciated and filled with hugs and kisses for all you've done and continue to do for your most precious gifts. I've already shed some tears today thinking about the life changing impact becoming a mother has been for me. On today's very special day dedicated to all mothers, I share this poem of reflection from Dr. Shefali Tsbary:
-The Gift -
May you be blessed with a child ....
Who defies you
So you learn to release control,
With one who doesn't listen
So you learn to tune in,
I came across this image above and loved it! How often have you found yourself saying and doing some version of this?
"Don't yell at me! I'm the only one allowed to yell!" is exactly our way of asking our kids to do as we say and not always as we do.